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Tryna' stay awake.
       Anonymous

thepoetspace:

itsthelesbiana:

Up until I was about two years old my hair was completely straight. My family used to call me the Blasian baby because I had super dark, straight hair. My hair started to wave for the next few years but it didn’t curl yet…so my mom would do finger coils in my ponytails. 

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In elementary school my hair grew so long and I got teased for it. Girls would pull on it and say mean things because “I had pretty hair.” I hated it…so in the sixth grade I cut my hair off. It went from almost waist length to just below my ears at the snip of scissors. 

By middle school, my hair had grown a lot and I had it at bra strap length. Then again…. I was teased. Girls thought that I thought “I was too cute.” They tried to fight me and at one point my hair was attempted to be set on fire… one girl told me I didn’t deserve to have nice hair. I remember crying to my mom about it, telling her I wanted a relaxer, I wanted to have hair styles like everyone else, I didn’t want to stand out in a way that made people dislike me. That’s when the over processing of my hair started. I went to the Dominican Salon about once every week or so. (Mind you they did not use any form of heat protectant) My mom would also use heat tools on my hair throughout the week (with no protectant) AND I used heat tools as well….

Entering high school my hair was completely damaged. It was stringy, lifeless, I had no curl pattern… it was just flat and boring. Sadly enough, I liked it that way. Short, overprocessed and under the radar. I also danced all four years throughout high school… both performance and competition dance…which also required a lot of my hair, causing it to break off even more. By senior year I had to do a project using a collection of photos from birth to then and people commented on the change of my hair. What happened? Yet… I continued damaging my hair to no end.

College comes around and I wore my hair straight. Freshman year I would straighten my hair at least two to three times a week. 

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Then I discovered YouTube. I had gotten so inspired by these women with such beautiful hair, who loved their curls and waves and kinks… I wanted that. I had suppressed my past so far back that I had even forgot my hair was curly. 

2012 was the year my life changed. I started lessening the amount of heat I put on my hair and used protective styles when I thought my hair didn’t look “up to par” without it. I learned about hair regimens and started implementing my own. By May 2012 I started to have curls of my own.

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Then I decided that I was going to big chop. My initial big chop date was August 2012 before I started school as a Sophomore but I gotten so addicted to the process of transitioning and learning about my hair that I couldn’t wait. I cut half of my damaged hair off June 16th, 2012 then the rest completely off the very next day. June 17th, 2012 was the day I was officially natural. 

I did all sorts of things with my hair: braids, twists, flat twists, bantu knots, rollers, protective styles of all sorts. I even dyed my hair.

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(rollers)

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(Marley Twists)

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(Braid Out)

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(Bantu Knots)

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(Chunky Twist Out)

I went from having about 2-3 inches of hair to start out with to it growing out and me actually seeing my curl/texture for what it really was.

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Then I started experimenting with heat styles, I straightened my hair, used a curling wand, all sorts of styles.

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(Curling Wand)

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I am now 2 years & a month natural and this is one of the best decisions I have ever made. I have learned to wear my hair as a crown and love it for the way it grows naturally. I can manipulate it in any way I wish but it is mine. I take the lessons that I have learned and the memories that brought me here and dap those demons up…because I have come a long way. Toward loving myself and all that I am. I am glad I made this decision because my hair truly shapes my physical appearance, like this is how I am meant to look:

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…and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Okay but listen y’all….


She is truly the kool-aid in my wine glass..

With her FINE ASS.